Monday, November 19, 2012

Lending... aka "I'm never going to see that thing again".

Today I find myself making a list of items I have lent out to people that it would appear I am never going to see again.  For years I had a strict policy of not lending anything I owned to anyone ever.  And it would seem that I was right to do so.

What is it about people that makes them not return stuff?  Is it forgetfulness? Spite?  A subconscious need to take other people's toys that stems from childhood?  I couldn't tell you.  And don't think that I'm not guilty.  I totally am.  As I type this, I have a set of books that are not mine that are just gathering dust while I don't read them.  But turn about is fair play I suppose.  The people I borrowed them from have a set of my books that are no doubt doing the very same thing (Maybe, they are likely very much using those books at the moment).  It's a mutual thieving at this point and we both know where the other lives.  Hell,  they have a key to my house. They could come get their stuff any time, just as I could do the same.  But in that particular situation,  I trust that they are taking care of my stuff and would give it back to me should I simply ask.

However, there are others.  Others who begged me for the thing they borrowed and have had said thing for two years, maybe more.  These same others also no longer have a day to day relationship with me. I haven't seen them in months.   I've asked for my stuff back and haven't gotten it.  It is extremely frustrating.

But what can I do?  It is not as though I'm going to get a lawyer to make someone return a book.  I suppose I could start naming names and inventory and defaming them on Facebook,  but even this post feels a bit juvenile to me so I doubt I would go to that extreme.

So I suppose my only recourse would be to replace the items with new ones and tell myself that the things those people borrowed were not borrowed at all,  but gifts given in a sort of aggressive style on the part of the giftee.

I assume that everyone else on the planet has this issue.  Unless they are quite wise and a bit stingy and refuse to lend out their stuff.  Ever.  Which I think I will return to doing.

Some people would say "It's just stuff, it's not important",  but really it is more than that.  The act of ignoring a request to return someone's belongings denotes that you have no respect for that person and intend to just keep whatever it is you've borrowed.  Which, for all intents and purposes is theft.

So yeah,  that's my rant.

Gimmie back my stuff.

Except you people that I've mutually thieved with, you know who you are, you're cool.


  1. It is just rude to borrow things and not return it when asked. If you forget and they forget that is a thing that happens, but when someone says I would like my stuff back give it back, preferably in the condition it was lent in.

  2. I tend to return anything I borrow, well only three items I've not returned waiting for Shawn to ask for them. I think he's forgot I have them....not like he uses them.>> Which reminds me, I need to borrow something from you Toni.:3