Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Isolation and Frustration

So, roughly three months ago, I was laid off from my job.  This has lead to many interesting and not so interesting things.  In the interesting column: I've started college.  In the not-so-interesting: I don't go anywhere in an effort to spend less money.  I'm receiving unemployment,  but it is roughly $100 less a week than I was making.  Which means we can't afford the gas to two cars driving about all week doing things. And since Joe has the job that makes the money,  he gets to go places (mostly just work).

All this not going anywhere business is making me a little batty.  And cranky.  And a bit resentful of a great many things.  I know this means that I'm still fairly wound up about being laid off even though my reviews had  always been spectacular.  I mean, come on, if you're gonna pretend to lay people off by way of eliminating their position, they least you could do is let go the people who didn't do their job well.  Not to mention, you could wait a few months (not a few days) before listing my position on all the hiring sites.  If you were eliminating it, why would you be hiring for it?  A part of me thinks that I would have a solid case for wrongful termination.

And then, there's the valiant attempt at starting a business. Everyone who sees our stuff sure does like to look at it.  But that's about it.  I know none of this happens over night, and I keep telling myself just to keep at it. It's frustrating.  And other influences outside of the business aren't helping.  Like seeing work the equivalent of art projects I did in elementary school selling like hotcakes on Etsy.  Or a lack of support.  Or being talked down to by people who have no idea how to do what me and my partners are doing; as if they were experts.

I see slights where there are none.  And I'm sort of turning into a hermit.  Luckily, before I was laid off,  we paid for a Disney trip.  So, that will be nice.  I'm very much looking forward to it.  In the mean time,  I know I just need to keep breathing, and everything will be just fine.